The views expressed in this report are entirely the author’s own and neither Oxford Cricket Club nor the author encourage smoking. In fact, the author is a tee-total non-smoker and all-round good guy.

For most people, cigars have always been synonymous with victory and happiness. As a former student of history, I think it has been the constant propaganda reels from WW2: rations, digging for victory and an inappropriately plump bloke signifying victory whilst holding an equally plump cigar. And the V for victory has had a double meaning also: defeating your enemy but also giving them a “send-off”. Preferably with a fat Cuban resting in the crook of the index and middle fingers. For generations of Englishmen, the two fingers go back further even than WW2: all the way back to 1415 and Agincourt and St Crispin’s day, when the choice of wood for stout yeomen was yew instead of willow. It was also the day of the underdog: a small force winning against the odds. But the cigar is the thing. Who can forget that iconic image of Ian Botham in the Headingley changing room, padded up, wearing a long-sleeved cable-knit jumper (who on earth wears a long-sleeved jumper these days?!), replete with a long, thin stogie. Ahh! One can almost smell the heavy aroma of success! And once again, the underdogs prevailed. Lastly, I think it was Aldous Huxley who wrote, “you should hurry up and acquire the cigar habit. It's one of the major happinesses.” Now there’s a statement. I didn’t know that “happinesses” was a word. I suppose that’s where Hamlet got their catchphrase …

Talking of hamlets and happinesses, the match against Charlbury, a sizeable hamlet squeezed into a bumpy corner of the Evenlode valley promised both. However, they were visiting Oxford 3s’ incomparable Marston facilities and were welcomed by a locked gate and a deserted field. One of the Charlbury contingent was heard to remark, “this is so village”, as the gate was being lifted off its hinges to be unceremoniously dumped to one side. The sheer chutzpah! They should have appreciated the padlocked gate for not allowing any old riff-raff into the ground via its official entrance. And I had so been looking forward to the drive in. I had still enjoyed the scoot along the gravel track, the short journey redolent of a scene from a Coppola or Scorcese classic: the hero rushing along, raising a cloud of dust behind him, peasants jumping out of the way and into the muck and nettles on the side, the Godfather theme being strummed melodiously in the background. People just don’t appreciate the small things in life.

Fast forward to the early evening of the same day. The sun was still shining and providing a modicum of warmth. However, the shadows by this time were long and ominous. I should remind you that we were not actually playing on the usual Marston square: the game had been moved to the Exeter college square just across the now dry brook, at the eleventh hour (literally). Although a good wicket, there was an important difference that would have an effect on the game: no sight screens and the injudicious planting of a copper beech amongst the stately, towering, Lombardy poplars.

Chasing the “Cs’” creditable score of 230 all out in their 45 overs, Oxford had made a brilliant start with the openers putting on 97 for the first wicket in good time. Steven Cootes had looked in fine touch with some classy shots before succumbing to an LBW. It was a surprise that he was out in that manner and confessed that he had not seen the ball due to said lack of sight screen, the sun obscured completely by the stately poplars. I empathised but did not realise it was that bad until I got to the wicket and we reached the business end of the chase.

Hitherto, after the opening stand, a 45-run partnership had been forged between the captain Steve Hurt and newcomer Adam Neill. After a quick fifty, Hurt had been somewhat becalmed by lack of pace but had completed a captain’s innings of 62. Neill carried on the task with Ali Shah for a 46-run partnership off 47 balls. With the bowler bowling around the wicket, I was able to take 14 from his penultimate over. Needing 10s in the last six overs, we felt we were always in with a chance with Neill beginning to cut loose.

That was before a change in bowling from the Marston ground end when a tallish young lady took the ball and chose to bowl over the wicket. The ball was just about visible from around the wicket with the lightish-green poplars in the background. However, now, the previously innocent-looking Fagus Sylvatica Purpurea made its presence felt. This was the injudiciously planted copper beech with its rich, purply-red leaves directly behind the bowler’s arm.

Needless to say, upon release, the dark red object in the bowler’s hand melded nicely into the reddish foliage. This is no idle cavilling at being out. Here you have at least two batsmen who were done by the tree and lack of sight screen! I will ever look at a Fagus Sylvatica the same way again.

However, as the saying goes, some things happen for the good and upon the fall of the wicket, Mark Sheehan strode purposefully to the wicket and promptly smacked the bowling for a couple of boundaries. His progress was cut short by the wearing pitch as a half-tracker almost rolled along the ground to bowl him.

The Charlbury total was now looking fairly unassailable but if there is anything that I’ve learned this season, it is that this 3s team are die-hards to the end. Cometh the over, cometh the man. And that man was Adnan. In cricket there is an appeal in batters who can smack big sixes: in the nether reaches of the Cherwell League, these are the blacksmith counterparts: swag-bellied and big-hearted, able to turn a match with a few swings. In the 3s we are lucky to have Adnan as our man with six appeal. With Charlbury all but celebrating victory, Adnan launched a few thunderbolts and nearly swung the game, turning it into a nail-biting last-ball thriller. Even the most die-hard stoic would have been stirred by the game’s twists and turns. Alas, it was not Oxford’s day: six needed off the last ball, bowled from the Fagus end and Adnan could only edge it to point. Charlbury could count themselves lucky to have gotten away with that one. We, from the boundary, could count ourselves lucky to have witnessed such a close game. Close, but no cigar.

Earlier in the day, the game had ebbed and flowed as the visitors won the toss and batted first. Wickets were hard to come by initially with the 3s feeling that they were playing another away game due to the change of ground. It looked like the away team would post a huge total at times but the fielding and bowling in spurts and starts kept Oxford in with a chance. There were a couple of big partnerships but the home fielders and bowling did well: Matty Wyatt and Adnan picked up a couple of wickets each while Joe Ward notched three to his total with wicked turners that went through the gate. There was good support from Moses Pritchard and Ali Shah. Meanwhile, the ever-reliable Alf Symons was playing in a different game, bowling six overs for just eight runs and four of those were wides!

If there is one thing that separated the two teams, it was extras and specifically, wides. Captain Hurt had talked about curtailing extras in the last game but his advice clearly fell on deaf ears. The team gave away 52 extras, easily Charlbury’s highest score. Of these, there were an eye-watering 29 wides! Charlbury’s third-highest score. How different a game we would have witnessed even with half this number of wides.

All in all, it still turned out to be a very competitive game with Oxford totally unfazed by the 200-plus score. While the batting is now firing, the bowlers have to step up and work on their lines in what could be a glorious season of cricket. I know it will be and I will be there for the next win, humidor at the ready.

Ali Shah.